Wednesday, March 08, 2006

Musicians Jokes

Flute players wear pink and giggle at anything.

Oboe players are very down to earth but prone to emotional drama.

Clarinet players are very friendly and will buy you beer. Also quite kooky.

Bassoon players are extremely intelligent and attractive people, if a little vague. Male ones are often gay.

French horn players have... issues. (as usual, hahaha)

If you're looking for the brass players, they'll be at the unibar drinking beer.

If you're looking for the pianists, they'll be at the unibar drinking beer and smoking pot.

Percussionists are intense, complex, interesting and talented.

Drummers = not so much.

Violinists are highly strung, pun intended, and snobby.

Viola players are quiet, patient people with a good sense of humour. Probably from being the butt of so many jokes.

Cellists are sexy. (Oh yoyoma)

Bass players are great, chilled-out, friendly folk. Can't play in tune; don't really care. (Eine Kleine Nichtmusik would sure be glad.)

Guitarists all seem very quiet and introspective. Maybe they're making up for always playing too loud.

Singers are all attention seeking, egotistical divas.

And there you have it. Of course these are all highly exaggerated sweeping generalisations, but you'd be surprised how often it's actually true.

Tags: music, instruments, orchestra, humour, jokes, horn,

1 comment:

Rob said...

Hi, Chern Jie! Thanks for the link, though I'm not sure why I get mentioned under bass players (violinist that I am). Also not quite sure how the link ended up in my comment box about Petite's relationship problems; if I hadn't recognised the name I might have thought you were a spammer (yecch!).

Heard a good musician's joke recently:

Q: Why are violas bigger than violins?
A: They're not. It's an optical illusion; the violinists'
heads are bigger.

And of course there's the old favourite:

Q: What do you call someone who hangs around with musicians?
A: A drummer.